Courage, Inc. & HerStory

Wounds

2009-10-30T00:06:00.005-05:00

Greetings Fellow Travelers!

I have been contemplating wounds lately. I am not speaking of physical wounds, though these may be a part of the soul-spirit-heart wounds of which I speak. The wounds I have been considering are those that, just perhaps, continue bleeding even though I can no longer see the blood. These are wounds that I denied. Wounds that I shoved a bandage on and left without further attention. Wounds that were inconvenient. Though this space is not my personal journal - I keep that elsewhere so that you don't have to read about my adventures in housecleaning and the like - I have decided to share a bit about one of my own carefully hidden wounds, its ultimate exposure, and the beginning of healing. My hope is that it will get you talking, meditating, considering.. Opening to the wounds you yourself may have hidden. You all know by now that I am an absolute supporter of walking through the muck....wounds can be pretty mucky. So without further ado....

I have known my woundedness for sometime. Had you asked, I could have provided a list of events and their corresponding puncture-slash-tear-scar. I could have done it easily, as though I was telling the story of someone else. I have dug around in those wounds. Cleaned them out, examined the damaged tissue, put in medicine, and sewn most of them back together. Most of them, the specifics, have scarred over leaving lines both thin and thick on my heart. Leaving phantom lines the color of soot on my spirit. I know where they are, and for the most part, they are healed. I have learned what I could learn and moved forward.

Some though, some are still open. They have scabbed over and torn again over and over in this lifetime. They keep reappearing and reminding me that my work is never done. I am, as you all know, on a mission of healing. A mission of growth and change, transformation and ultimate authenticity. This means that I must always be attentive to these wounds and must be especially awake when one is seeping. I must admit that sometimes a particular wound has been open, red and swollen, and I have ignored it to the point of not thinking it was there. Denial seems a beautiful thing at times, my friends.

At the beginning of this year I dedicated myself to the element of Earth. I did this because I knew that many of my wounds are centered in my relationship with my body. I had spent the past couple years walking through fears of abandonment and alone-ness, and I figured that the great healing that must come must be there - my bones, my skin, my stomach, the temple or the vehicle in which I have made this journey in this life thus far. I knew that the active war on my body ended some time ago, but that peace had not yet been achieved. It had been long since I starved, purged, cut or simply neglected this thing that is so much of who I am in this life. But the wound had not been healed. There was more work to be done, and I vowed to do it.

And in the process, I have discovered a much deeper wound. One that has been open and bleeding for some time. This wound is one that is old and not so old. It is a gash laid open over a slice laid open over a deep scar. Like the heroine in Bluebeard, I have ignored the blood running from the cabinet, walked around it, my bloody footprints following me down hallways and through hidden passages in my quest for my own truth. Had I looked behind I would have seen them and known that something was amiss. But I was driven forward... Driven to look away. Driven to deny to reality of this deep wound.

Until...one day....something or someone came into my life unexpectedly. Isn't that the way adventures of great proportion begin? Something happened that I had not imagined would ever happen, and suddenly, quite suddenly, I looked over my shoulder, and I saw the bloody footprints that I had been ignoring. Saw them and knew. Knew that if I was to fully embrace this unexpected gift for as long as it was mine to embrace, I would have to retrace those steps and find that bleeding wound. I was flooded with awareness. As though a wall had come down. I KNEW what that blood was, knew where it was coming from, and knew that it was time to face it, clean it out, and allow it to heal. And I believe that by doing this, by accepting, embracing, cleaning, and healing this wound, many of the other wounds will be healed as well...

And here is the long and short of it.... The deepest wound, the seeping, infected wound that I ignored and eventually denied, sits in the deep secret corner of my heart. Security, safety, knowing my own truth, believing the truth of others....trust. Trust, lay, like a small child, quivering and bleeding in the corner of my heart. Afraid to speak for fear she might say the wrong thing, afraid to ask for fear that she might be refused, afraid to reach out too far for fear her hand might be slapped, afraid to touch for fear that her touch might be thwarted. Afraid to be.....exist......live. For fear that even in that she would be wrong. Perhaps the first wound was inflicted long long ago with more scratches, gashes, and punctures being laid over that first as the years went by.... It doesn't matter. What matters is that now healing can truly begin. I am aware. I am open. I am willing not only to scour this wound but also to let Trust come out into the light of day. She has cowered in the dark corner for too long. Trust can only fully heal, can only learn to use her inherent magic, by practicing.

And I can only learn to trust by trusting.

courageous journeying!
Tara

Heart Courage - a dab of word-play

2009-10-20T23:27:00.001-05:00

Hi all! We're still looking for art, poetry, story, and songs to be shared here! In an effort to encourage those of you who are just a bit shy, here's one Tara wrote a few years ago.

Peace

Heart Courage

My heart so swollen
Sweet honey liquid love
GROWING SPILLING OVERFLOWING

and

My mind breaking
CRASHING! SMASHING! SLASHING!
and crumbling...then...

quiet silence blinding darkness
Sweet honey-filled heart lost
encased in the rubble of my mind

Changing reaching pushing growing
Reaching for the light
Slowly, slowly, slowly. . .
Pushing out
Through the remains of catastrophe

Tara Elizabeth Moorman

Emerging from the Cave

2009-10-20T23:03:00.002-05:00

It has been some time since I joined you here, Courageous Journeyers. I do so apologize. I have been in a bit of a whirlwind and have only recently brought myself back down to Mama Earth once more.

I have talked much about spirituality and the journey into oneself, and now I will share something of emergence. Emerging from a cave. You know, our society has (at least to some degree) maligned caves and other inner Earth space. These places are dark and frightening; they hold mysteries beyond our limited comprehension. Jesus emerged from the cave; we hear nothing of his time inside. As a pagan, and a womyn on a path of growth and change, the imagery of the cave holds something else entirely. It is a place of deep work, deep comfort, and yes, mystery. It is a place to die and shed, to dance and spin darkness, and to face our shadows. It is the womb, and we go there so that we can be once again reborn.

Sometimes, we may find ourselves lost in the cave. We may not even know that our breadcrumbs have long since deteriorated, our silver thread evaporated, our path covered over with the dust of ages. We may, like Ameratsu not be able to see our own beauty for a time, and we may forget that the outer world holds many treasures. Some may find the darkness alluring and may become....accustomed and afraid to emerge...until....

Something happens. Like Uzume dancing, laughing and telling bawdy jokes, something calls us from our dark lair. Something draws us. Something pulls and tugs or yanks us out into the light. And only then do we realize how long we have been away. We realize how cut off we have allowed ourselves, in our seeking, to become. And once this realization is fully accepted, we see just how bright the outside world can be, how lovely, how flawed, and how amazing.

And we rejoice.

This journey is about finding the balance between the need to go inward and our work (and play) in the outside world. There are few who can spend all of their time in the dark inner worlds. Likewise, there are few who can stand eternal exposure to the light. Systers, I have come to realize that finding that balance is a part of this life's (and perhaps many others') great journey.

Wishing you more courageous journeys and much joy,

Tara

Music as healing

2009-09-14T15:39:00.004-05:00

Music is the mediator between the spiritual and the sensual life. ~Ludwig van Beethoven   

Music heals me. It is able to capture the full range of human emotion, soothe the soul, or break a cracked heart. I’ve found music to be a huge support in my life journey, serving as somewhat of a bumper guard through the ups, downs, lefts, and rights of life. Ever since I was a kid, I remember being fascinated with instruments, rhythm, and sound. There was nothing like a guitar to calm my nerves. I started seeing shows early on, and fell in love with the euphoria that I experienced during a live performance. I love connecting with lyrics that touch my emotion, and listening to a musician share themselves in order to connect with human suffering, or ecstasy. Music is the poetry of the soul. I find music has the ability to move me into corners of my soul that go untouched with just the interactions of everyday life (although music exists here too). In those corners, I find my true self, which blooms the more I pay attention to it. Music is my healing salve. It has been used to contribute to healing in many traditions for as far back as we go. Shamans used drumming to induce altered states of consciousness, and Sufis use dance and music to connect to the sacred.I cannot imagine this life without music, closing my eyes and feeling myself floating through timelessness with the rhythm, or surrendering to a sound that provokes my tears. And, moving…dancing…sensing my body, as my bones connect to the beat. What compares? I finally picked up the acoustic guitar about a year ago, and found I could connect with music in a whole new way. Songwriting has also been an amazing route of self-expression. And, combining lyrics and sound make for a whole new unexplainable experience. I now seek everyday to re-connect with my rhythm by listening to the sounds and rhythms of nature and all that moves and exists around and within me.

I encourage you all to sing, dance…and re-connect with your rhythm!

Many Blessings!

Christine

I have my own particular sorrows, loves, delights; and you have yours. But sorrow, gladness, yearning, hope, love, belong to all of us, in all times and in all places. Music is the only means whereby we feel these emotions in their universality. ~H.A. Overstreet

Trance Shamans

2009-09-06T23:31:00.003-05:00

Alright everybody,

Here it is....Trance Shamans is a group that I work with. We create and offer a healing modality called dual-voice trance. We actually use multiple voices and drum. It's pretty amazing. I really encourage you to check out the site (and be sure to listen to the audio), and if you're in the Austin/San Antonio world and are interested in checking our work out, there's contact information listed. This is one of the best deep-work healing modalities I've ever experienced, which is why I wanted to be a part of it.

Peaceful evening,
Tara

2009-09-06T14:08:00.001-05:00

The technology issue revited..

Our most recent drumming

2009-08-25T10:44:00.007-05:00

Was fantastic. I will need to be brief because I've put myself on a path that is, at least temporarily, extremely busy, but I wanted to make sure that I posted how wonderful our drumming was! The energy that we created, the healing that we offered one another, and the warmth, love, and laughter were precisely the reasons Courage, Inc. wanted to create these opportunities! The falling stars, sprinkling of rain, and the lovely Guadalupe added a perfect backdrop to the night.

Here's a little quote from a friend who attended:

I wanted to share with you-all concerning the drum circle Sat night. It was AWESOME!!!! ... we had approx. 8 or 9 Womyn join in this healing circle of singing drums. My Spirit and physical Self was sooo incredibly moved just drumming. To top it off I had a turn sitting and floating in the center of the drum circle.......shooting stars were flying above me as the Magical Womyns drummed their Love and Light into the circle.

We created a little bit of magic I think.

Peace and rhythm!

Tara

Another piece of beautiful artwork

2009-08-25T10:34:00.003-05:00

Good morning,

It's another beautiful day, and to start it off, we're posting a beautiful and inspiring piece of work by Jasmine Dennis. This lovely multi-media piece is perfect for both HerStory and Courage, Inc. The body is sacred, and in Jasmine's work, it becomes sacred art.

Enjoy! And please remember that this lovely image is the property of the artist. Contact artemiswarrior@gmail.com for information or permission to copy. We will contact Jasmine and let you know if copying is ok.

Peace and artful wanderings!

Tara

on Spirituality

2009-08-09T11:02:00.004-05:00

*Note before reading: there are some opinions in this post that may not resonate with your own. Please know that the author is in no way looking for a fight, looking to insult or disrespect, or re-incite the Burning Times. This is simply a discussion of one of the ideas Courage, Inc. uses in our work with womyn.*

I have, this morning, been contemplating spirituality and what it means to live a spiritual life. I have my own ideas, and you'll get to read them later, but to begin, I decided to check the dictionary. For ease of purpose and the fact that the online Merriam-Webster is (I thought) more up to date than the big dictionary I have here at home, I used the online version and included the links for your own perusing.

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/spirituality

Main Entry: spir·i·tu·al·i·ty
Pronunciation: \ˌspir-i-chə-ˈwa-lə-tē\
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural spir·i·tu·al·i·ties
Date: 15th century

1 : something that in ecclesiastical law belongs to the church or to a cleric as such

2 : clergy
3 : sensitivity or attachment to religious values
4 : the quality or state of being spiritual

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/spiritual

Main Entry: ¹spir·i·tu·al
Pronunciation: \ˈspir-i-chə-wəl, -i-chəl, -ich-wəl\
Function: adjective
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French & Late Latin; Anglo-French espirital, spiritual, from Late Latin spiritualis, from Latin, of breathing, of wind, from spiritus
Date: 14th century

1 : of, relating to, consisting of, or affecting the spirit : incorporeal <spiritual needs>
2 a : of or relating to sacred matters <spiritual songs> b : ecclesiastical rather than lay or temporal <spiritual authority> spiritual>
3 : concerned with religious values
4 : related or joined in spirit spiritual home> spiritual heir>
5 a : of or relating to supernatural beings or phenomena b : of, relating to, or involving spiritualism :

Neither of these excite me very much, and I'll tell you why: First of all, the first three definiitions under spirituality are associated with the clergy and the church, and while the word spiritual is first defined as "of, relating to, consisting of, or affecting the spirit" the rest are either directly or indirectly linked to the church or to the "supernatural". Those that know me well will quickly see why these definitions cause my feathers to ruffle. For those that don't and would care to know, read on.

Point by point, here we go:

1. Spirituality is no more the property of the clergy than bits of your body can be seperated out and judged like slabs of steak. Spirituality pertains to spirit, and everyone has it, so spirituality is yours, hers, his, and mine. There is not one expert that can hold spirituality for another or tell them what it is or what to do with it.** Further, "the sacred" does not belong to anyone, and nobody can tell you what is and is not sacred. This also means that an intermediary between us and "the sacred" (whatever that means) is not necessary. If I want to talk to "the sacred", I talk. I don't need a robed, cloaked, or hooded person (notice I didn't say man or woman, because it doesn't matter either way) to talk for me.

2. To say that spirituality pertains to religious values implies that those who align themselves with no religion cannot be or are not spiritual. Have they no spirits? Spirituality and religion are seperate matters. Religion can surely help people (who look to religion and religious activities) gain and maintain a spiritual connection, but religion is not a necessary piece of spirituality, no are all religious people spiritual.

3. Equating spiritual with supernatural is just silly and this is demeaning to those that practice forms of spirituality (or religion) that include just about anything immaterial (Isn't *God* immaterial and thus *supernatural*?). It demonstrates a very materialistic, rationalist stance, which is outdated and fails to respect the multiple realities of the human (and non-human) race. Come into the postmodern age, Dictionary folk!

4. The dictionary definition of spirituality does not speak of *action*. And this, Readers, is where I will step into our themes of in-powerment, courage and authenticity. Are you ready?

"Of, relating to, consisting of, or affecting the spirit." Let's assume that everyone has spirit. Or Spirit. Each of us may perceive what this means differently, and that's fine. Courage, Inc. approaches womyn's in-powerment, courage and authenticity from a spiritual bent. That is not to say that you're expected to believe what we believe or define spirit, Goddess, Great Spirit, God, True Self, or tree, the same way we do. One assumption that Courage, Inc. does make, however, is that the growth, connection, and maintenance of the spirit (or Spirit) is absolutely causally connected to womyns' in-powerment, courage, and authenticity. The growth and development of the Wild Self (Wild Spirit or Wild Soul) depends on walking a spiritual path.

Notice that the phrase used was "walking a spiritual path" and not "getting a spiritual goosebump now and again." This is important stuff for those of you committed to the path of in-powerment, growth, transformation, courage, and/or authenticity. You see, if you go to a great ritual, a wonderful church service, tent revival, trance dance, drumming, or Aspen Grove, you might get chills, goosebumps, or as my Hawaiian friends call it "chicken skin." Of course you might! I, for one, have had many many many ecstatic experiences that brought me closer to my conception of Sacred than I can even tell you about. I have been moved, shaken, rattled around, and CONVINCED of my connection. And I spent years doing that - going from one goose bump to the next chill to the next outbreak of chicken skin. In the twixt and tween of those moments I was often apathetic and depressed, selfish, borderline abusive, miserable, self-centered, irritable, impulsive, compulsive, and afraid. And then I'd go get another goose-bump hit or fix. I could not figure out how all my *spiritualness* was failing me. I tried the religious thing too - prayed, confessed, churched...same result. I did magical incantations, deep visualizations, candle spells, and the Hail Mary. And my life stayed the same.

Why?

I missed the boat on spirituality, Ladies. I called myself spiritual because of all the goose-bump things I did. I thought that praying, goose-bumping, and ritualizing would make everything ok. And maybe for some folks that works. But it didn't for me. I have always longed for a deeper and more constant sense of connection. The *Sunday Christian,* *Sabbat Pagan,* and *meditation retreat Buddhist* didn't do it for me. I was not in-powered. I was fixed - either once a week or once every couple months.

The missing link:

Practice, action, aligning values and work. The decision to step onto a path of growth and change, a spiritual path, a path of transformation, is a big one. It involves a looking back, and realizing what has come before; a looking in, to see what's been hidden, stifled, repressed and secretly in charge; a looking out, to see the nature of the real deal - the beauty, the connection, and the horror of the world in which we live; and another looking in -- deeper this time -- looking and listening for that cord, that cord that ties you, that connects you to the greater Spirit (whatever that is). The path requires an examination of values and principles. It involves learning new things or relearning old things. But it can't stop there. Contemplation, knowledge, and insight will only go so far. This path requires aligning action with all that knowledge and insight. It means connecting what you do with what you honestly, most deeply hold and believe to be true. Acting according to spirit and Spirit. Acting against those parts that are fearful, too comfortable, deluded, self-centered and self-seeking, and power-less.

Contemplation, insight, and knowledge help paint a picture of what the Wild, Authentic Self might look like (note, the wild, authentic self is in this case synonomous with the wild, authentic spirit and soul), but only acting on those things will bring Her forth.

And so, because we are a feminist systerhood and believe that it is important to place ourselves within and with those we work for and serve, here is a personal example of what I'm talking about:

My life was one filled with fear. I was afraid of what everyone thought of me, I was afraid of what I'd see if I looked deeply into myself, I was afraid that I would be rejected, abandoned, deserted, and would ultimately die alone. Most of all, I was afraid to live. My life was full of self-pity, and I played the victim very well. I manipulated my way through to avoid all that fear. I sought out people to take care of me because taking care of myself meant standing up, saying no (or yes), and facing those fears listed above. The multitudes of spiritual and religious paths I tried would make me feel good for a few hours or even a few days, but my underlying character stayed the same.

A few years back, I decided I was tired. And I asked for transformation. Actually, I asked the Goddess of Time, the Great Devourer, Mama Kali, to be devoured, the sickest part of me eaten and thus cleansed, and spit back out again....reborn. I had played with the idea before, but some part of me knew that if I truly stepped out on that path, everything would change, and I would have to face my fears.

My strongest spiritual values (which are aligned with my Goddess beliefs) are Courage, Joy, Compassion, Integrity, and Authenticity. What does this mean on a practical level? It means that when I am afraid (and of course I'm not talking about true physical danger), I look at what the fear is and walk through it. It means that to the best of my ability I look for joy of life rather than happiness in moments (and this sets the stage for more fear to walk through). It means that in my day to day run-ins with sentient beings I try to act with compassion and not judgmentalness. It means that I do what I say I will do. It means ultimately that I use each moment as a decisive moment and walk toward my own truth, even in the face of cultural, societal, and even familial pressure. Do I do any of this perfectly? No. Have I stopped seeking teachers along the way? No. It means that I do my level best to practice my spirituality day to day and not just rely on a goose-bump now and again.

What is spirituality to you?

What are your spiritual values and how do you live them?

What challenges have you endured in order to walk you own spiritual path?

If you have not yet stepped onto that spiritual path, what holds you back?

**This is not to say that clergy, priestesses, and shamans do not exist, do not have some special skills, do not have a different or perhaps more intense experience set, or cannot provide wisdom, healing, and counsel. It is simply to say that the spirit and the sacred can and should be experienced by each individual. Taking ownership and respond-ability for our spiritual lives is important, and while clergy, priestesses, and shamans can help in that arena, ultimately, my spirit is my own.

To Be Real - a Review

2009-07-26T13:48:00.009-05:00

To Be Real by Rebecca Walker. Published by DoubleDay (1995). ISBN: 0-385-47262-5

What does it mean to be a REAL feminist? Does it mean you can’t wear a dress, or let someone open the door for you? Does being a “real” feminist mean you have to be a lesbian? A butch? What about wearing nail polish? “To Be Real" answers the REAL feminist question with creativity and courage. In a time when the face of feminism seems to be transforming, many of the assumptions of what it means to be a feminist are being challenged .

Inspired by activist and writer Rebecca Walker, “To Be Real” is a collection of stimulating and hot essays by young activists who challenge the “ideals” of feminism and write about their relationship with the women’s movement, and their own experiences and beliefs. These writers and activists come from many different perspectives and whether gay, straight, female, male, black, or white, they tell the raw facts about who they are, and how they’re working to change and transform the world.

The following is an excerpt from the book's introduction by Rebecca Walker:

"The ever-shifting but ever-present ideals of feminism can't help but leave young women and men struggling with the reality of who we are. Constantly measuring up to some cohesive fully down-for-the-cause identity without contradictions and messiness and lusts for power and luxury items is not a fun or easy task. As one woman said to me at a small Midwestern college where I was giving a lecture, "I feel I can't be a feminist because I'm notstrong enough, not good enough, not disciplined enough." At an all women's college in Virginia, another young woman expressed relief when I told the group that there was no one correct way to be a feminist, no seamless narrative to assume and fit into."

As a young, blooming feminist, I found this book to be shockingly fitting. I’m guilty of often believing I need to fit myself in the standard box that I thought was feminism. After reading this book, I was able to take an honest look at my own assumptions, fakeness, and experiences in order to bring myself to a place of realness. I came to realize that the “way” I thought I needed to look or act to be a real feminist was based on old standards that do NOT fit me. I also concluded that trying to fit into this delusional box meant that I was being exactly the opposite of authentic. This book gave me permission to be myself, and most importantly…to be real.

Happy Reading,

Christine

Technological Trap

2009-07-26T12:53:00.013-05:00

Technology will save us if it doesn't wipe us out.—Pete Seeger

There are countless ways in which technology has helped our world today. We could spend hours discussing the advances we’ve made because of the machine. Lately, I’ve been becoming more aware of the ways in which technology has not only shut us off from the spirit, but raped us of the ability to connect authentically with each other.

The other day, I watched a group of friends walk into a coffee shop together, beginning their visit with laughter and what seemed like happy interaction with each other. Within 15 minutes the laptops were pulled out, and their attention shifted from each other to a computer screen…..then, the inevitable zone.

My 13 year old sister, who I see once a year, came to visit last week. She spent hours on myspace, and asked me more than once if I would stop text messaging while driving. I saw a group of kids (couldn’t have been older than 14) sitting together, each of them had their faces buried in their phones. Is our youth being over-stimulated by technology to the point where they will have absolutely no idea what it’s like to just BE? Is text messaging ruining our ability to have genuine face to face (or even ear to ear) conversation with each other?

And yes, I am just as guilty as anyone else of falling into the technological trap. There are days when I spend hours distracted by the computer. I’m not saying that we don’t need technology. We do. I just wonder how far away we’ve allowed ourselves to get from those things that truly fill our spirit. Can we find a balance with technology so our spirit does not die? Or, will technology continue to serve as a wet blanket on our internal flame?

Please share your thoughts! We'd love to hear from you.

The Woman’s Encyclopedia of Myths and Secrets

2009-07-24T21:36:00.003-05:00

The Woman’s Encyclopedia of Myths and Secrets by Barbara G. Walker. Published by Harper San Francisco (1983). ISBN: 0-06-250925-x

I’ll start this review by reminding everyone that questioning the written word, regardless of who writes it, is always smart. Take a look around, do your research, and come up with your own conclusions. With that said, take a gander at Walker’s compilation of myths, stories, fables, and old wives’ tales. This is a wonderful addition to every womyn’s library!

Barbara G. Walker is a noteworthy feminist who has written several books including Amazon, a short and enjoyable little fiction, and The Woman’s Dictionary of Symbols and Sacred Objects (both to be reviewed in upcoming posts). If you’re looking for anything other than a feminist perspective, you won’t find it here. Walker has certainly taken some time diving into the subjects she’s written about, and she writes in a literary and easily understandable language but always from that particular angle. This 1119 page tome starts with “A”: “The letter meant the Creatress” (p. 2) and ends with “Zurvan”: Archaic Persian deity of Infinite Time” (p. 1102-1103). She has included a lengthy bibliography, which lends itself to our ongoing scholarly pursuits and really shows that she’s not simply making her ideas up - a plus as far as this life-time student is concerned.

Curious about owls? Walker writes about them. Want to know more about the origins of the word Yoni? It’s in here. Looking for a feminist’s perspective on Moses, the trinity, or the cross? Walker talks about all three. She also gives some great descriptions of various Goddesses, including Kali, Freya, Demeter, and Brigit as well as lesser known feminine deities like Skadi, Flora, and Hesione. Take a look at her entries on both Mary and Hell if you want a new standpoint. Are you trying to find a new (or old) way to celebrate the year? Walker talks about a great many of the world’s holy days including the European, pre-Christian celebrations of Imbolg, Lammas, and Samhain. This author traces the origins of words, cross references ancient and Christian holy-days, looks at sex (shhh!), witchcraft, the burning times, vampires, werewolves, war, and the vagina dentata.

Is this the one and only book you should ever look to for obscure feminist information or mythological perspectives? I wouldn’t suggest it. But if you’re interested in all kinds of colorful, off-color, sacred, heretic, symbolic, and linguistic twists and turns; it’s a great book to snatch up. Since it’s old, and a bit off the mainstream, there seem to be quite a few used versions floating around. Enjoy it. Put it someplace where you can take a peek when you’re bored or seeking inspiration. Make up a funky, feminist trivia game. Flip it to a random page, use it for specific research, or read it straight through – A to Z, and then dive into the bibliography.

Read to open your world. Read to expand your mind. Just read. Why not?

blissful reading!
Tara

Woman Who Glows in the Dark - A Review for HerStory

2009-07-19T13:57:00.007-05:00

Hello all! I'd like to introduce you to a wonderful read. Woman Who Glows in the Dark has become one of my favorites, and if you're a healer of others or someone who's working on healing yourself, I highly recommend it! Note: The title of the blog is linked to a great bookstore called A Room of One's Own. They sell this lovely book! I tried to link you directly to the book's page, but couldn't get it, so just throw the title into their nifty little search space and ROCK ON!

Peace, Tara

Woman Who Glows in the Dark, by Elena Avila, R.N., M.S.N with Joy Parker (Jeremy P. Tarcher/Putnum, 1999). ISBN: 1-58542-022-0

I picked up this book during a period of my life that was pretty crazy. I was a bit obsessive and strange, and I vaguely remember a book-buying spree that resulted in about 20 books that seemed related at the time and ultimately had nothing to do with one another. I didn’t read any of them then. I decided to read this book as a part of a larger study, because I have come to a point in my life as a we’moon, wombyn, wommin, womyn, and as a professional, where I feel that HEALER is my calling. I am a counselor/therapist, and I have a sense that something is missing in the modern, mainline understanding of illness – mental illness in general. I am constantly seeking healing and understanding in my own life as well as a framework for understanding the illness and wellness of others – those I come into contact with both personally and professionally. Ultimately, perhaps in my crone years, I would like to work more exclusively with wombyn and somewhere outside the mainstream therapeutic environment. This book is a step in that process.

In this little report, I only describe the very basics of what Ms. Avila covers in 332 pages. I certainly could have gone into more detail, but then, why would you have to read the book? She is a better writer than I am (as you’ll see in the poem below), and it is well worth your time, whether you are a healer or you simply seek to understand your own spirit more fully, to read her words. I highly recommend this book! It was fantastic.

I woke up to my illusions

And now I can’t sleep.

I have no desires,

And now I can’t eat…

What you dish out to me.

I’ll stay awake forever if

I have to.

I live in the crack of an egg –

In the space between galaxies

And earth mud.

Along the thin borders

Of enlightenment and

Darkness.

I saw through the smoky mirror,

And my third eye winked at me!

Time is an illusion,

And eternity lives

In the cracks of everything

That is dualized.

I like living

In the middle of

Either/or,

And gray is my color

In black/white.

I’m cozy in the nucleus

Of past/future and…

I am the ember seed in

Light/dark.

I am

Woman who glows in the dark.

I’ll stay awake forever

If I have to.

~Elena Avila

The poem above is the first introduction to the world of Elena Avila, registered nurse and Curandera. Ms. Avila’s book on the traditional healing practices she refers to as the “medicine of the “three-headed serpent”” is also a story of her own self discovery. She introduces readers to the history, beliefs, tools, and rituals of curanderismo, which is, she states a blending together of the people and healing practices of the Spaniards, the indigenous people of Mexico, and the Africans brought to this country as slaves. Woven into her description of this body/mind/spirit/soul system is her own “wounded healer” story. She talks frankly with the reader about her own sustos (multiple soul losses), her pain, growth, and feelings of ultimate joy and belonging. Ms. Avila’s journey as a curandera is as much one of self discovery and healing as it is a path toward healing others.

Ms. Avila begins by describing the 3 major contributing healing practices of curanderismo: Spanish, Aztec (also Mayan, Incan, etc., but the type of healing Ms. Avila practices is based on the Aztec), and African. Out of this mix of cultures, the Mestizo people were born, and the blended healing practices of curanderismo developed. Ms. Avila describes curanderismo as “a system that was deeply rooted in practical observation, in the thousand-year-old traditions of three continents, and in the personal style, creativity, intuition and spiritual strength of the healer.” (p. 16).

Central to the belief system of the curandera is that all beings – human, animal, plant, mineral, water, earth, air and fire are a part of the living earth system and thereby connected. “Illness occurs when one does not live in harmony with all aspects of the self and nature.” (p. 19). Though Ms. Avila describes several of the folk illnesses that curanderismo deals with, she pays much of her attention to susto or soul loss. Susto is caused by trauma, whether it is physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual. When a soul “runs away” the spirit has lost contact with the divine, and the person suffering susto might exhibit signs of mental and/or physical illness. Addiction is one example given, and since the population I work with now are chemically addicted beings, I was intrigued by her descriptions. Ms. Avila points out that susto like other illnesses in this paradigm, affects body, mind, emotions, spirits, soul, family, community, and nature. Guiding the person back to balance is key.

According to Ms. Avila, the strength of curanderismo is its practicality. It uses whatever works. Herbs, counseling, soul retrievals, psychodrama, rituals, spiritual cleansings, and even referrals to medical doctors, are tools that a curandera might employ. An important point made is that the spiritual beliefs of the curandera are central to her practice. This is very different from both modern medicine and modern therapy, where the spiritual and religious beliefs of the practitioner (and sometimes the patient) are strictly taboo. In curanderismo divine intervention is a part of the healing process, and Ms. Avila works with her patients to understand their personal belief system as well as to explain hers. She uses personal stories, examples from her 2 decades of work as a curandera, and her experience with her apprentices to illustrate the creativity, loving-kindness, and practicality of her practice.

To close, I’ll just say again, this is a wonderful book, and anyone interested in healing themselves or others would benefit from reading it. In this report, I’ve only given a few key points, but they are the points made throughout the book in a more poetic, touching, enlightening style than I could ever manage. Read it, enjoy it, drink it in! It’s worth it.

From my mentor and syster, Kiva: 2 Exciting Opportunities: Medicine Woman Tradition and Herbal Energetics Intensives!

2009-07-13T12:01:00.003-05:00

Hi, all. I'm snipping some great news about Anima intensives here. Please visit the link for the full-meal deal. http://bearmedicineherbals.com/?p=705

"This year I am so excited to be offering two very special Medicine Woman Herbal Intensives! Each one is appr. one week in length and highly recommended to those of you who have been waiting for an in-depth opportunity to study herbal medicine and the Medicine Woman Tradition with me in person. For those of you who have been considering a Student Internship at Animá, we are now instead offering these shorter, but just as intense series of workshops geared towards women who learn best through hands-on experience and personal interaction! New topics and longer intensives may be available in the future based on demand and interest.

The first, offered August 7th-13th, is the Medicine Woman Tradition Intensive, focused on the core principles of healing as wholeness, herbal energetics, the wounded healer archetype, wild medicine, totems, constitutional herbalism and more. A celebratory learning experience for all those who feel called to follow the path of the Medicine Woman!

Then, from September 9th-15th we’re offering the new Walking the Medicine Wheel Intensive, an in-depth and detailed look at learning, integrating and utilizing herbal energetics in practical, sensory and hands-on way. I’ve had many requests for this series of workshops and I’m extremely pleased to finally be able to offer them this year!"

Jayne's Words

2009-07-13T11:39:00.000-05:00

Greetings all... the words below were written by Jayne Stephens. She lives out in beautiful Asheville, NC, is a mom, a daughter, a great friend and sister, and a stained glass artist. Thank you, Jayne, for allowing us to post your poetry here!

Stars dancing in the sky

reminds me of the sparkle in your eyes

Always gleaming

Always smiling

never dying

laughing,

loving

and

living.

Smiling brightly

Eyes shining

heart pounding

That's me thinking of you.

Butterflies inside,

feeling alive,

electrified w/ touches

from you.

Years go by and

time flies with

the fire burning deep inside....

this is me in love

with you.

Memories come crashing in much like the

waves to the shore.

The sun reflecting off the waters much like the windows to the soul.

The ocean,

the memories go hand in hand

down the beaches of the warm sand.

Memories created and memories washed away,

like every wave to the shore, every day.

The heat of the day, like being in the desert and seeing a mirage, the waves

of the heat coming towards you and then drifting away.

Are they really there?

Can you see far beyond the heat?

Do you smell the hot sun burning down on you?

It's wanting to take you in and smother you in the breasts of the mother land.

It is stifling and yet comforting, confined but free.

And soon there will be no sun, soon it will be night and

the cool air will take away the warm arms that held you so close.

Take a long, deep breath and feel the burning sensation that has filled your lungs

all day.

Relax, look at the stars twinkling in the sky.

Calling your name, wanting you to dance with them in the bright

moon light.

Go ahead, do it, no one cares - it's just the many eyes of the sky

above that you dance for.

You let yourself go, be free.

Dance to the rhythm of the night sounds,

be free~

Please remember that all the work (or play) posted here belongs to the author. Please do not copy without permission. If you have questions, please contact artemiswarrior@gmail.com.

Have a creative day!

On Food

2009-07-12T11:17:00.009-05:00

Hello all.

Not a big, wordy post today, just a little note on food. I just read an article, recommended by an old high school acquaintance on that Chinese-food culprit MSG. You can find it by following this link: http://www.denverpost.com/perspective/ci_12805299?FORM=ZZNR8.

Doesn't it seem like every time we turn around we're hearing more and more about the poisons that are in processed foods? Yet how many of us continue to stop by the local gas station in the morning for a packaged donut, use the oil-base sugary creamer that now comes in a syrup-like form and 45 different flavors, stop at Jack in the Box on the way home, or eat a boxed creation that says it's enriched with everything you need (the fact that it's a cheese product and located on a shelf far from the refrigerator and with a stated shelf life of 8 months notwithstanding)?

Why should we talk about food at Courage, Inc.? Well, if you've looked at our web-page, you know that one of our interests is body-image, but that's not really the issue here. The issue is this: in the quest for our authentic beings, our wild souls, our deepest core, developing a healthy and loving relationship with our bodies is critically important! This is not about transcendence. This is about Connection. And this is another arena where, if we attempt to move away from the cultural norms (faster, easier, and microwavable) we may have to do some hard work, we may be judged, and we might have to re-examine our relationships to body, self, and others. Yikes.

Just as an experiment, take a look at what you eat. Have courage. Flip that box over and get out your magnifying glass. Think about all those chemicals. Think about what chemicals have done to rivers, soil, the ocean, plants, and finned, feathered, and legged creatures. Get real with yourself for just a moment. I'm not telling you to STOP eating that packaged donut; I'm just saying think about it while you do. Really connect with it. See how many of those chemicals you can taste underneath the sugar load.

What do you think? Did you learn anything new?

Consider this: How could food fit into your journey toward greater authenticity, wildness, strength, an in-powerment?

What are you willing to do today?

peace, courageous journeying, and an MSG-free day!

Tara

The Rules Part 2

2009-07-11T20:17:00.006-05:00

Heartfelt bows of gratitude to those who commented on the recent blog-post!
A bit more about how The Rules came into my life. The inspiration behind Courage, Inc. was my own journey (which is far from over and won’t be until my last breath in this life) toward greater authenticity, my own Warrior path, my own road to greater healing; the path of ThisIsWhoIReallyAm. The rules that I posted HERE became glaringly clear in my own life as something that held me back from my authentic self; and I was amazed at the chains I had allowed to be wrapped around my DeepCreativeWarriorDancerWild Soul. Worse, I realized that not only had I allowed the chains to be wrapped around me, I had snapped the locks shut, and I was the only one who knew the combination that would open them. Finally, I also had to come to the distressing conclusion that I was terrified to be free of those heavy chains. Who would I be without them?

Who would you be?

The reality (as I see it) is this: There is a particular box that society would like us to fit into. Now, there are different sections in the box – type of job, car, house, regional rules and norms – but overall, for all of us, the box is the same. And it really isn’t all that big. It has a big label on the side that says something like, “Success,” or “Beauty.” The rules are penned underneath that large label. And according to the “powers that be”, whether that’s your government, your church, or your family and friends, everybody is supposed to fit in that box. EVERYBODY.
And there are a number of reasons why a number of people don’t. First, there are those that have no chance of ever making into the box because the Box-Entry-Judge deems them unworthy. If we focus only on the “box” for those of us in the US, the list of credentials needed to get past the Judge and into the box have changed a little bit over the years. There was a time when the box was filled completely with White, land-owning males. That’s changed a little, but not too much. Some womyn are allowed, assuming they look the right way, are married to the right man, have the right job, and fit into a particular socio-economic category. The box isn’t entirely Caucasian anymore either. There’s a scattering of folks with different racial and ethnic identities. There might even be a few folks in there with alternate sexual identities and preferences, but in order to stay in the box, they probably need to fit the other criteria and keep their sexual identity and preferences under wraps, at least to some degree. So, the box may have expanded somewhat, but there are still those left completely out. Many of them can be lumped into one category: poor. Others may simply be unable or unwilling to hide enough of what doesn’t fit and emphasize enough of what does. And there are other folks who are in the box, but have the budding sense that they don’t fit in - and maybe, just maybe, that they don’t really want to.

A caveat here. I (and thereby, Courage, Inc.) have nothing against anyone who fits into the box. If you are reading this, and you are happy, whole, satisfied, and joyful, WONDERFUL!!! Truly. Authenticity is not a small, tight-fitting box of chains. There is room inside (and the box of authenticity is round, by the way) for everyone.

But I believe it is important to be fully transparent about where my own passions, and the focus of Courage, Inc., lie. Courage, Inc. is really focused on those womyn who have found themselves in a box that doesn’t seem to fit, doesn’t feel right. That is not to say that womyn already out of the box are excluded! But I am a womyn who lived in the box, though somewhat around the edges, while her insides were screaming, “I don’t belong here!” I am a womyn who struggled with all sorts of maladies that I have come to believe resulted from attempting to cram myself into a space that wasn’t the shape of my life, that didn’t give me enough room. So my passion lies in helping other womyn who are living in the box and who want to find their way out, toward the authenticity that will save them – whether they fit all the categorical requirements for the box or not.

How do we move toward greater authenticity when our culture does so much to hold us back? How do we find the courage to unlock the chains of ThisIsWhatYou’reSupposedToBe and walk forward on a path toward greater understanding, the path of ThisIsWhoIReallyAm?

There is so much at stake – whether we choose to unlock those chains, or not. On the one hand, if we break the chains, we risk losing our perceived sense of belonging and comfort. On the other, if we remain, we risk losing our true, pure, whole, Wild Selves.

Courageous Journeying!

Tara

Art by Elaine Moses

2009-07-11T17:43:00.007-05:00

Elaine, thank you so much for sharing your art with us. These paintings are gorgeous. Creative blessings to you!

These paintings were submitted by Elaine Moses. We request that art not be copied or used without the artist's permission. If you have any questions regarding this, please e-mail artemiswarrior@gmail.com.

Letting go of old rules, ideas of success, outdated values

2009-07-07T11:57:00.004-05:00

Human beings grow up to become at least partially a product of the culture they are raised in. When I speak of culture here, I speak of multiple levels: the family culture, the neighborhood culture, the regional culture, the national culture, and nowadays, the global culture. Some bits are more prevalent than others depending on who we are. Some rules in Western Industrialized nations, and particularly in our United States are:

1. Success is defined by how much money you make, how INDEPENDENT you are, what you look like, how big your house is, and what school you, your spouse, and your children went to.

2. Beauty is defined by how thin, muscular, and rich you are and often by what clothing style you wear.

3. Your intellect is defined by the degrees you have achieved and the grades you've made along the way.

4. Creativity is judged by what others think looks good at the time.

5. Value is placed on so many things other than health, wellness, authenticity, children, and real-life learning.

6. If I don't have it, I should have it, and if it takes time to manifest, I don't want it.

These are just some of the rules that come to mind, or values or what have you. If you can think of more, please send them along.

Some of us spend our lives trying to live by these rules only to find that we are not quite able to do it. Something just doesn't feel right. We just don't fit in. And we keep trying, or, in some cases, we beat ourselves up or numb ourselves out because we can't make it work. Eventually, many women I've met (and men, but since our focus at Courage, Inc. is on womyn, I'll stick to that) don't have a clue who they are, what they really value, what they want, or what they need. They wouldn't know true wholeness if it bit them on the butt. What many of them do know, sense, feel is that something is wrong. Something doesn't quite fit. They often feel empty, spiritually bankrupt or void, numb, agitated, caged, stuck, silenced.

The journey toward authenticity is one that each womyn must embark on in her own way and in her own time. We live in a society that is spoiled - we want a pill to fix the problem, we want someone to give us what we need or want (and often we don't know the difference) - finding the authentic core is inherently NOT like that. Call it what you like - the heroine's journey, walking through the shadows, the shamanic healing. Whatever. To find and cultivate authenticity, wildness, integrity and truth takes a lot of personal WORK. Can we surround ourselves with supportive others? Yes. Can we find different pathways that others have walked before us? Yes. But ultimately this work is work that must be done for one's self. In that sense, it fits nicely with the all-American emphasis on Independence. But it's different. The path to authenticity moves along over hills and rocks and flat spaces, and my path interconnects to your path and her path and his path. The deepest core of me is the thread in the web of Wyrd, the northern Germanic notion of interconnectivity, and your deepest core is another thread in that web. We are touching each other and all things at all times. We are never alone.

This is important information, since the Heroine's journey, the journey toward authenticity, can often seem lonely. This is because for many that journey means walking away from preconceived notions of what success, beauty, richness, and popularity mean. For many, this journey means walking away from who we thought we were. It can seem very lonely. Understanding and truly gaining a sense of the inconnectivity of all things can go far in helping us, supporting us, holding us safe along a path that can be scary.

So tonight, with the moon full above you, find a tree or rock or field or a safe place in your urban living room, get as quiet as you can, and ask for guidance: "What does my authentic self look like?" and "How do I know or sense my interconnectedness to others (living, human, animals, plants, ancestors, the Earth - or other beings you can think of)?".

Journal, paint, draw, color, scribble, use clay.... about what you learned.

And if you'd like, share it here. Or just send us a blurb about the experience.

more to come.

courageous journeying,

tara

Getting Started

2009-07-05T13:03:00.004-05:00

Personal In-powerment cannot just be something we think about. If I sit around in my house thinking about how in-powered or empowered I'm going to be and don't do anything to move forward with my aspirations, dreams, and known needs, I am not ACTING from a place of in-powerment. I'm just thinking about it. Cheers to smart people! Cheers to thinkers! Yes indeed. Both are necessary and wonderful, but the fact remains: I cannot think my way into in-powerment. I must act. I must not just think, "I will be at my healthiest when I turn 40," or say, "I will own my own business," or write about "I will go on adventures to new places every year." I have to take these thoughts, statements, and flowery poems and MOVE.

And so today Courage, Inc. is officially on the internet. Will She stay in Her current space? Probably not. I'm searching for a more complete and more cost effective approach. But the important thing is this: She, the website, has gone from the pile of things to do when to a real thing. Check Her out and look for improvements as they come.

Courageous Journeying,

Tara

More Art, More Healing

2009-06-28T01:22:00.005-05:00

Once I was able to move past the idea that art needed to look a certain way, I found painting to be a very healing form of expression for me. I also realized that creating had little to do with skill, but more to do with intuition and honesty. My paintings are an honest expression of me, in that moment; or, they are an experience, dream, or idea that wants to take form. The painting below is called "spiraling to the surface". The idea behind the painting is about letting go of all that keeps me from being authentic, and allowing my heart to discard the inauthentic ideas/beliefs/fears that made a home within me.

Today, I'm dedicated to honoring the little artist within by continuing to create. I hope to see some art from others.

Peace,

Christine

Seekers, Students, and Teachers by Jesse Wolf Hardin

2009-06-27T11:18:00.005-05:00

Hi all. Though both Courage, Inc. and HerStory are primarily about womyn and for womyn, both are also keyed into ways to open to our wild, creative selves and the inspirited wonderful Earth Mother. I am a student of Anima (we have a link - check them out), and while Kiva Rose is my primary teacher, if it weren't for Jesse Wolf Hardin, a true lover of Mama Earth and all things wild, the sanctuary would not exist. Besides that, he is brilliant, and his words will always be worth sharing. So! Don't be alarmed if occassionally you visit and there are posts by this earth activist and teacher (and other wild, Pan-loving men). And in fact, I'd encourage you to go even further, open up and listen to what he has to say. The path of the seeker student is magical. Peace, Tara

Teachers & Seekers:
Opening Up to Being Taught, and Awakening to the Fact That We All Have a Role to Teach

By Jesse Wolf Hardin

When I was a very young child my mother told me what a little teacher I was, somehow showing adults how to look at things in new ways in spite of my obvious lack of experience on this planet. I didn’t fit in at school and never felt like I had any close friends, yet when my fellow students had something deep or vulnerable to share, a poignant and debilitating fear to deal with, a nagging question to be explored or important choice to make, they would search me out for insight and advice. Forty years later, it is as a teacher that I am most known, even more than as a historian in spite of my many writings on the subject, more than as an accomplished artist, lover or land restorationist, outlaw primitivist provider or admittedly wild-eyed activist shaking the pillars of an unjust and ecocidal power system. And I accept the role of teacher as a primary responsibility… not because humans are more deserving of my attention than art or wildlife, but because of the fact that it’s people’s adopted ignorance, dearth of self-knowledge and self-love, degree of unclarity and depth of insecurity that are most impacting the health and integrity of the entire planet and everything on it large and small.
The rewards I get from this are huge. Just as I take great satisfaction from seeing this canyon flourishing with a forest of wildness I myself planted, so too am I made content by the expression of gratitude from folks that I have inspired assisted, instructed, guided, empowered and supported. There is little that could be more touching, than for my partners and I to regularly hear from our students, clients and readers that “you have changed my life,” or that “thanks to you, for the first time I feel wholly, completely alive!”
As much we appreciate the credit and feed on the gratitude, sometimes I find the only way I can help is by allowing someone to act as if they had come upon the insight on their own, independent of my orchestrated assist. And there are a few others (usually male) that I cannot seem to get through to at all, their boundaries so practiced, identities so fragile and thus resistance so great that I am unable to penetrate. Of these relatively few disappointments, there have been some who have denied and decried the very concept of teachers and teaching. Usually these have been politically correct egalitarians with a need to feel that everybody is not only equal but in possession of equal amounts of knowledge, experience or insight to share.
It is actually a core tenet of the Animá practice we teach, that we are all teachers of a sort, responsible for our effect on the larger living world. It would nonetheless be a mistake to downplay the importance of wizened human mentors and other (including plant and animal) instructors and inspiriteurs. There are no true “solitaries,” only those unaware of their teachers, or who have yet to meet and align with their allies on their path. If the fact of ecology and the dynamics of spirit and magic tell us anything, it is that we are inextricably interconnected and fully interdependent, and that none of us really “get it on our own.” Almost every correct conclusion or healthy choice has benefited from the examples and wisdom of other people, of the generations who came before and evocative more-than-human nature. And even when we hear truth from our hearts, we are speaking from and for the needs and will of the entire sacred planet we are a part of. Even our instincts are handed down, palm to paw to hand, from distant primal ancestors, the result of hundred of thousands of years of challenge and mistake, opportunity and fear, elation and pain, persistence and reward. Insight, revelation and even seemingly extrasensory perception all draw from and are informed by a reservoir of accumulative memory, pattern and association.
All of us human recipients and repositories are also designed to be vehicles and transmitters, with the capacity to be conscious instructors and role models. On the other hand, only a small percentage of those who have an impact on other’s lives, are by nature equipped for and devoted to teaching others, and who thus become defined first and foremost as teachers. The depth and integrity of knowledge, breadth of experience and enthusiasm for passing on their lessons and gifts is what distinguishes and defines such teachers. For these relatively few, it feels not only personally satisfying but somehow essential that they pass on their lessons and gifts, just as true artists – those essentially defined and completely dedicated to creativity – not only construct occasional expressions of beauty but actually live and breathe art… and just as true leaders are those naturally committed to doing the crucial work of moving forward regardless of the costs and rewards, not feeling fulfilled until certain they have left sufficient blazed trails for others to follow.
From the time I ran away from military school as a young pup, I searched high and low for those individuals who might be able to best teach me, or inspire me by daring example, in the ways of being real and purposeful in a culture of artifice and distraction. Some, like the revered philosopher Alan Watts, did indeed offer words that were like brilliant stars to navigate my life by. I was encouraged by the audacious authenticity of Ken Kesey, and the ways of the traditionalist Native American elders that I hung out with. The primary author of The Great Cosmic Mother, Barbara Mor provoked me to go beyond the simplicity of black and white and into the world of layers and twists. Experiences with others – indigenous shamans and control-freak charismatics alike – taught me about the human absurdities, contradictions and failings of even the most brilliant of our kind. I learned that we should give thanks to every influence whether flawed or not, just as we are grateful for every mistake we learn from and every poignant test that we survive.
To the degree that we in this culture have come to disrespect or feel leery of leaders and luminaries, elders and teachers, it is the result of witnessing or hearing about people from politicians to gurus who practice “power over,” whose insecurities result in their coveting rather than inspiring and engendering power in others. Such people tend to claim that they have exclusive knowledge and abilities unavailable to their students no matter how much they might study and practice. They fear they would lose their following, and thus their identity, if they were to teach that others have the capacity and responsibility to learn and then make important choices themselves, and the means with which to grow and to know.
My partners and I are here to help awaken and embolden the teacher within everyone who works with us. We will neither force nor allow anyone to become a dependent. Every session I hold, every line I write, is meant to be a full class from which you the seeker or reader graduate, and with which you are then impelled to act. The work of the Animá Center is to aid others in the honest realization of their individual medicine ways, to help lead you to the lessons of dynamic nature, the place of both knowing and doing where truth and purpose reign.
———————-
Sidebar: Teachers & Seekers
The following lines from my book The Way Of Animá, are like all of my knowings, the result of a great listening. You could think of them as Gaian Sutras, passed from the inspirited all-knowing whole to this wordsmith in moments of confusion or need, insights and aphorisms that cut to the chase, practicable tools for clarification and choice that beg to be embodied, implemented and lived:
• This inspirited planet we are extensions of, is our original teacher. Thus one of the first steps in becoming an effective teacher ourselves, is to become a lifelong student of the natural world.
• Every exchange of information is an alliance of purpose, between that which expresses, and that which hears. That purpose is not only the education of the individual, but also the informing of the earthen whole… to our mutual and collective benefit.
• All things have something to teach us. All things capable of learning, are students. All students of life, have learned lessons they can then share with the world.
• Seek what is true, and then honor what is found. It is always as close and connected as our hand, as expansive and complete as this ever unfolding universe.
• A seeker becomes a teacher whenever she or he shares the truths they’ve found with others. At the same time, no viable teacher ever quits being a seeker.
• The purpose of the teacher is to point to phenomena, reveal connection, heightenawareness, and encourage engagement and depth. To nurture the seeker’s compassion, and affirm their intrinsic beauty, practiced skills and developing love. To encourage healthy skepticism, expose harmful untruths and help eliminate self serving lies. To instigate response and direct action, inspire service and purpose, and foster fulfillment.
• The most conscious, experienced or innovative of human teachers are more the vehicles for practical and spiritual truths than they are their source.
• A teacher does not explain mysteries, so much as illuminate and acknowledge them.
• Anything we learn from, is a teacher. Thus to resist the idea of teachers is to deny that we have anything to learn.
• The problem is not so much that we have a hard time trusting the sources of truth, but that we are sometimes unwilling to give up those ideas that we wish were true.
• Teaching is a joint accomplishment.
• For seekers to fully “own” their abilities, accomplishments and purpose, they must personally and willingly pay the cost… and learn to take credit for having done so.
• Once we know that everything we are and do affects those around us, we become partly responsible for what effects we have.
• For ideas to affect the world, they must first be translated into action. For these reasons, a good teacher makes sure the student is in touch with her feelings — and that she feels empowered to act on them.
• Likewise, the best teachers will strive to be catalysts — and never a surrogate – for the student or seeker’s direct experience and personal revelations. Such teachers will direct focus away from themselves and, instead, in the direction of that which they have been fortunate to see. Rather than imposing definition or interpretation, a teacher leads or excites us in the direction of meaning.
• The teacher’s purpose is not to criticize or judge, but to awaken, alert, inform, unsettle, positively correct, inspire, encourage and applaud. At the same time, it is as important for a teacher to capitalize on a student’s challenges as on their abilities, as crucial to point out any illusions as it is to point to the truth.
• Not all lessons or gifts are accepted, fewer are understood, and fewer still are really put to use. Thus a student must open to new lessons without any expectations. And a teacher would best share her or his vital lessons without expecting anything in return.
• An Animá teacher plants the seeds of awareness and empowerment that he or she were themselves given… and with no certainty of results. They water them with tears. Feed them with their hopes. Anoint them with their heartfelt prayers. Support them with honesty and affirmation. And embolden them their cheer.

Getting over the notion of perfection

2009-06-27T00:23:00.007-05:00

So, one of the core beliefs here at HerStory is that we can all create art, and our art does not have to meet anyone's standards of perfection or beauty or importance or WHATEVER. We can create just to create. We can create things that come out of our dreams waking and sleeping, and we can create what pops into our minds at any given moment! It doesn't matter! I struggled for a long long time with notions of perfection, and those notions kept me from creating anything except what I was told I was good at. I didn't put color on canvas until I was 37 because I was afraid it wouldn't be good enough. Good enough for WHOM? I don't know. Once I did it, well, I came a step closer to figuring out a truth that has become a key tenant in my life: The things that I was told I could not do (dance, have rhythm, sing, and do anything artistic) are the things that make me feel most free, whole, wild, complete, sane and authentic. That's my truth and I'm stickin' to it.

So, this first painting is called *Singing Creation*. It is one of the first things I painted in 2007, a year that had me learning to speak my truth. I did three paintings in succession that year, and they are all related to singing, speaking or dream-speaking my truth and my creativity. None of my art is really created for public consumption, and that frees me up to do whatever I want. Most of it comes out of my visions, trances, and dreams, and all of it decorates my house.

This next one is called *Lorna*. Lorna began as a failed attempt at a papermache mask of my own face, and she became a hungover mermaid with a seashell pill-box hat. Lorna wasn't a dream or a trance vision. She was therapy. I was in a particularly down-mood, and creating *Lorna* helped get me through it.

So what is art to you? Is it therapy? Is it play? Is it your vocation? Whatever it is, HerStory believes that we should embrace it!

Peace and Creativity!

Tara

Our 2nd Drumming!

2009-06-26T10:27:00.005-05:00

Hi All! Courage, Inc. will be hosting our 2nd Night of Women's Drumming and Storytelling on July 18th, 2009 from 6:30pm to 9:30pm. The location is beautiful - right by the meeting point of Turtle Creek and the Lovely Guadalupe River just outside Kerrville, TX.

We have some core beliefs around this event. First, that all living things have rhythm. Just look at a drop of water under a microscope! And if you think, "ok, water has rhythm, that doesn't mean I do," well, look at a drop of your own blood under a microscope. It DANCES!!!! Second, percussion was the first sound we heard in the womb, and we are natural percussionists. Third, stories, told around a campfire, at the community crafting site, or at a child's bedside, help to pass along the culture of the tribe. We believe that strong womyn stories can help to rebuild our strong womyn selves. So! drumming and storytelling! Flowing water, twilight sky, and systers. What a lovely lovely lovely idea.

Besides all that, love donations will support the local crisis shelter! How can you go wrong?

If you're anywhere near the area and would like to come, please email courage.taibhsear@gmail.com for more information, directions, and what to bring.

courageous journeying,

Tara

Contemplating the sometimes painful path to authenticity

2009-06-25T19:05:00.002-05:00

Wouldn't it be lovely if the path of growth and change, the path toward our authentic, true, wild natures, was easy? Perhaps. But that is not the case. Often times figuring out who we really are and finding the courage to strip away the masks and show ourselves, bare naked and raw, takes some painful and burning stripping of masks that have become like skin. We womyn who have deliberately put ourselves on this kind of journey, and those of us who have been thrown onto the twisting road of the heroine because of some trauma or strange life events, face our fears around every term, or at least it seems like it. Here's a personal story of coming face to face with one of my greatest fears: the discovery that I am not perfect.

I have been functioning in the working world for some time now. Since I was 18, so more than 20 years. And I have always, even when truly sick and crazy, tried my best to make sure those in the world of work thought I was Little Miss Perfection. I held the delusion that if I was not absolutely the greatest thing since sliced bread, well, something really really really bad would happen. And if that came to pass, then surely I would blow away and die. One day not all that long ago, I found out that attempting to maintain that mask, refusing to ask for help or admit that things were sliding out of my own control, was really the road to destruction. Imperfection would have been a better deal.

Things were very busy at my place of employment, and I was, admittedly, pretty burned out. Rather than admit that I was drowning, I let a lot of paperwork slide - always with the understanding that I would catch up before anyone knew about the problem. Ha! Finally, my fear in this area caught up with me. Before I could do a magic trick and fix everything myself (thereby maintaining my image of absolute perfection), I was found out. Somebody did an audit, and the missing paperwork was like a gigantic red wine splot on a perfectly white, Grandma's vintage, table cloth. I was written up at work for the first time. I could have been fired. Oh devastation!!!!! Really, being *found out* was worse to me than the notion that I could be fired... How strange.

Because I am a Warrior on a path of healing and deep authentic work, I could not and would not hide from what had happened. I refused to crawl in a cubbyhole. I turned my back on what would surely have been my response in years previous - RUN. And the next day I went into the office and thanked my boss for disciplining me, for *outing* me. I thanked him because I needed to feel that *smack* that is about not being truthful and not being authentic. I needed to because I needed to realize that attempting to show others how perfect I am is NOT my path. It was in that moment that I stood in my power. I didn't go to him with my head down. I had my head up the entire time, and it was great because it was a moment of realization - realizing that I am fully human and that that is enough. Wow.

Perhaps some of you reading this have never felt that fear that I speak of here. Perhaps. If you have, hey, join the club. And now that you've joined, walk up to that huge dragon of fear, face him. Walk through him. Do it. Now. Courage is not the lack of fear. It is action in the face of fear. I guarantee that once you've walked through it, you will have gained an ally.

courageous journeying.

tara

My Journey to Courage, Inc.

2009-06-23T12:04:00.000-05:00

Tara's Journey to This Day
I would say that this journey began sometime in 1970 when my mother worked oh-so-hard to bring me into this world, but as I grow older and explore more, I am more convinced that this journey began not at the beginning of this life, but at the beginning of time. I wholeheartedly believe that my thread is as interwoven as any other in the great creative dance of the Earth. That said, my personal journey, the one that this Self knows well because these feet have walked it, began sometime in 1970.
I was born a coal-miner’s daughter in the low foot hills of the Smoky Mountains…. Or not.
Actually, I was born to a mom and a dad who were doing their best to survive after lots of trauma of their own. My mother had been a run-away and had already served time in the state mental hospital twice because of her alcoholism and wild ways. My father had already served 3 tours in Vietnam. And I was the star in their sky. Truly. There was never a question in my mind about whether I was loved or not.
Nevertheless, circumstances were such that I was always trying hard to keep our family boat from rocking. I had to protect my mother from my father and my father from himself. An experience when I was 5-years-old left me without a part of my child-soul and I believe may have started a long chain of events that were based on the fear and sense of loss that 5-year-old felt.
I became the ultimate pleaser. I attempted to achieve with grades, ribbons, awards, trophies, competition, and anything else I could think of that would make my parents, and later, anyone I was associated with, think that I was perfect, which in turn, would keep me safe. In the midst of all that I was also a chubby kid who learned right away that chubbiness was not the way to make me safe or to make people like me. I started secret-eating (shoving tablespoon after tablespoon of Nestle Chocolate milk mix in my mouth) at around the age of 7. I started dieting and exercising obsessively by age 10.
My parents’ increasingly chaotic existence (booze, booze and fights, booze and lovemaking) coincided with my puberty onset. My mother and I began fighting more often, and we both had moments of cruelty. I also suffered a severe tib/fib fracture at this time, which caused me to gain weight, lose muscle, and miss school. I was extremely awkward, depressed, and angry. And my parents were worried – about me and about finances. I received a lot of attention during this period, and after my leg healed, that stopped. My parents drank more often and were out of the house more often. I was lonely and miserable and scared. I discovered the magic of vomiting at the same time I discovered the magic of alcohol and the dirty magic of sex. It was a three-fold mixture of disaster. Within a very short period of time I was vomiting anything I could put in my mouth. I never binged and purged. I starved and ate to purge. I was hospitalized four times that first year for elevated liver enzymes and dehydration, and I managed to lose close to 30 pounds in less than a month despite ignorant doctors’ best attempts to keep me from “feeling nauseated”. It took me two years to decide that I would ask for help, and when I did, my parents were too lost in their own misery to hear me. I remember telling my mother that I was throwing up blood, and she said, “No you’re not.” So, I guess I wasn’t. I went underground again. On the outside, I was still succeeding in most of the things I did. On the inside I was dying. And in the corners, I was having sex with a boy who was emotionally and bordering on physically abusive, throwing up whatever I could get my hands on, stealing Valium from a friends’ medicine chest, and drinking whatever anybody would buy for me.
And that’s how it went for a while. When I graduated from high school, I took the first opportunity I could find to get away from home – I became a nanny and went to work for a family in Pennsylvania – far from my Wyoming home. That was also a disaster. As much as I wanted to run away from home, I was also hopelessly enmeshed with my parents and lived in fear of being away from them. I went back home 6 weeks early to a family that was truly unraveling. My parents met me at the airport, and at least my mother was intoxicated. She said, “You will never leave me. I control you.” Not a month later, a week or so after I moved into my own apartment, she tried to kill herself. Of course, that was my fault. In my mind at least. And for the first time I could remember, I hated her. I already hated me. My fears and self-hatred drove me into harder drinking, stranger thinking, cutting, and almost flunking out of my first semester of college.
My mom went to treatment and got sober. And I joined the Navy and met my husband-to-be (after a few sexual affairs where I manipulated my way into the attentions of young men I had no business messing with). My fears of not being good enough, not being thin enough, not being whatever enough, drove me so hard during this time. I fell in love, but in the midst of it, I was starving actively, anxious and crying, and manipulating my husband-to-be into believing I was exactly what he wanted me to be, which meant becoming whatever I thought he might even think he might want. And in the midst of all that, I had my first break with reality. I was diagnosed with Dysthymia and Major Depression, and later that went to a Borderline Personality Disorder diagnosis ….And that was that for the next 6 years. I was on medication and numb and off medication and on a manic-high throughout that period of time, and in many ways, things got better. I was an assistant dive instructor, got out of the Navy, worked as a vet tech and then for the government, lived in Guam and Hawaii and ended up with my Bachelor’s Degree and admission to a Graduate program in Anthropology. Then the world came undone again.
My Saturn return started just before my 28th birthday. Looking back on it now, I can see it all centered on my fears of abandonment and being alone. What those fears set into motion, though, were way beyond the scope of my experiences thus far. In January of that year I was sitting on my bed with a 9mm weapon in my mouth for what must have been the 5th time in about two weeks. I vaguely remember working myself into a frenzy of fear, passing out, and waking up with that gun in my mouth realizing 2 things: (1) I didn’t want to die, and (2) I didn’t know if the safety was on or off. I called a psychiatrist the next day. And I stayed sick for a long time after that. Cutting, drinking, hallucinating, being paranoid – those became my great reality. And somehow, in the midst of all that, I managed to hold a job.
To make a very long story shorter, I had a psychotic break that resulted in a changed diagnosis (Bipolar I with severe mixed episodes), lots of medication, and ultimately a change in career and the beginning of my true path to healing – for myself and my mission to heal others. My Saturn return began with a focus on my fears of abandonment and being alone. It is amazing to me that it ended with my realization that I was so much more than my fear had allowed me to be. Psychosis and mania somehow did for me what I could not manage in my normal waking hours. Visions and delusions of grandeur gave me a glimpse of what life was when I wasn’t constantly concerned with whether people liked me. The break also opened me up to divine experiences that I could not have had without psychosis or hallucinogens. And so I was changed.
And I began changing. I began actively seeking out change. Actively seeking my fears. Actively asking to be devoured and transformed. I started courting my Warrior-hood. And then my world fell apart. My greatest fear was realized – my husband and I separated after 17 years of marriage, my mother almost died, and I had to face how much I had built my life up on how others viewed me.
And my journey toward greater Courage, Integrity and Authenticity will never end. I will walk this path for the rest of my days in this body. And it is the greatness of this adventure, the pain of it and the vividness that has been the result that leads me here. Courage, Inc. and whatever it turns into is my calling. I have walked through dysfunctional family stuff, eating disorders, suicidal ideation, substance abuse, and mental illness. And I have faced Fear and taken Her as an ally. I’m here to say it can be done. That it must be done. And I’m here to offer my hand if you’d like to join me.Courageous Journeying,t

Joining You

2009-06-23T11:36:00.001-05:00

A bit about my journey: Telling the story of myself used to be a process filled with crying, sadness, and regret. Today….not so much. Bill Wilson, in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, said something to the affect of our dark past having the ability to become our greatest asset; he also said that we “will not regret the past, nor wish to shut the door on it” (page 62). I’ve found these two ideas to be true. I grew up with a single, crack addicted mother, who knew nothing of what it meant to be a selfless parent. I saw little of her sober, and was exposed to things that no person should ever see. These memories were hidden away in the dark corners of my mind, and I learned early on how to stuff my emotions and lie. As a child I didn’t talk much, for fear it would get me in trouble. I worked hard at trying to save my mother, who was falling deeper and deeper into the black abyss of addiction everyday. I had few friends, was extremely shy, and had a deep fear and mistrust in people. I lived in constant fear, would bite holes in the bottom of my sweatshirt sleeves, and remember watching my hands shake. Right at the brink of homelessness, or jail again, my mother decided to go to treatment. I went to live with my Grandparents, and experienced family life for the first time. My Grandmother actually tucked me into bed, read to me, and made dinner. As great as all this was, I missed my mother, and a year later reunited with her. She got married, and had a child, and for a couple years life was pleasant. I remained shy and fearful through middle school, making it very hard for people to get to know me. Athletics were my passion, and my escape from myself through these times. My mother started drinking, and eventually went back to cocaine. We lost our family business, our house, and our sanity. The few friends I had made, I left. And, at this point, I had found alcohol. By 14 years old, I was a full blown alcoholic, drinking 3-4 times a week, and cared little about much else besides my one form of relief. I began acting out sexually, and found that I could also find comfort this way. I had absolutely no idea who I was, and carried around massive amounts of fear and rage. I moved to Los Angeles to live with my Grandparents at 15. I stopped drinking for almost 9 months, just to prove to myself I wasn’t like my mother. I found that I didn’t think or care when I was drinking, and my alcohol intake began again, and increased to much higher doses. I began surfing and found a job at a local surf shop, which I loved very much. But, drinking, and then eventual drug use, led me to darker places. I found cocaine, then methamphetamine, and lost myself completely. I moved out of my Grandparents house at 17, and moved in with my friends to continue to use and kill the pain inside. My mother, who had been homeless for the last couple years, was invited by me to move into my apartment in L.A. Within three months we were high and homeless together. I was using my body to get drugs, lost all my friends, and was experiencing methamphetamine induced psychosis. I was miserable, scared, and barely standing. Circumstances led to me going to treatment. This is where I woke up. I knew that if I didn’t find the courage to face myself, and my past, that I would continue using, and if I continued using I would die. So, with no spiritual background, and NO belief in anything sacred or spiritual, I found myself seeking anyway. I found this Power was deep within me, and had not died. I tended this flame, which brought me back to life. I went to a halfway house for women for a year, where I learned to live, and let people love me. I learned to care for myself, and make responsible life choices. I paid my first bill. I ended up becoming the house manager of the halfway house that I had lived in, which led me to my career in counseling. I went to school to become a chemical dependency counselor, and began my journey as a wounded healer. I threw myself into my own healing process, and learned that the only way to overcome fear was to face it head on. I know Fear’s dark eyes well. I’ve stared in them many times. I learned to be uncomfortable in my skin, and how to transcend my own suffering. I found womyn who support my growth and change process, and learned that I had wings of my own. I’m still learning to use those wings. But, my path is a beautiful, humble, and sometimes painful one. I feel grateful for the life I’ve had, and the dark places I’ve walked through. I hope to support other womyn on their journey to re-connecting with themselves.

"I am not afraid…I was born to do this." –Joan of Arc

"Our work is to show we have been breathed upon – to show it, give it out, sing it out, to live out in the topside world what we have received through our sudden knowings from story, from body, from dreams and journeys of all sorts." -Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Women Who Run With the Wolves, 1992.

Peace, Christine

Greetings!

2009-06-22T23:07:00.003-05:00

We're oh-so-happy to be here at Blogger, and Courage, Inc. is happy to introduce HerStory, a syster group with like passions and artistic interests. We're a little slow right now having just returned from a week in the wilderness, but we'll start posting regularly here shortly. I'll also be moving our blog posts from livejournal over here, so you can get the scoop on our real beginnings!

courageous journeying!
Tara

Exciting News

2009-06-22T11:21:00.000-05:00

The systerhood here at Courage, Inc. has started a syster-company called Herstory! To begin, HerStory (and I'll get you the website info in a bit) will focus on raising awareness of feminist values, eco and Gaian Conciousness, and womyn authors, artists and poets through book trades and love donations. As we grow this side of our work, we'll keep you posted! You can look here for book reviews, essays, poetry and our thoughts on art and other such creative ventures. AND we're looking forward to having some cool womyn submit their creations and words, so you'll be able to read and peer at those too! Keep checking back for updates on this lively enterprise!

courageous journeying!

Shaman Intensive

2009-06-11T18:34:00.000-05:00

Hello all. Here's an excellent opportunity for rewilding, transforming, and coming alive.
Please Forward to Friends & Post to Any Forums–

Announcing:
The Shaman Path Intensive(for both men and women)
July 2nd - 5th, 2009
www.animacenter.org
A 3 day intensive held not in a classroom but an ancient Place Of Power. Taught by Jesse Wolf Hardin and Medicine Woman Traditon cofounder Kiva Rose … with the focus on realizing a deep and experiential understanding of empowered self… and on redefining the role of the contemporary shaman in terms of envisioning possibilities: maximizing awareness, discovering purpose, bridging the worlds, and personal, community and ecological healing.

“The change of direction can be accomplished only through what Carl Jung has referred to as ‘an obedience to awareness’.”-Joan Halifax The Wounded Healer
Specific topics will depend on the needs and desires of the participants, but may include:• Developing conscious hyperpresence, hyperawareness, hypersentience, precognition and intuition, tapping primal instinct• Sensing, connecting with, drawing energy and discerning lessons from the various manifestations of the earthen spirit.• Recognizing and learning from our kindred spirits, including our animal totems• Reshaping perception• Plant medicines and teachers• Moving energy, and the Animá principals of healing• The Animá Medicine Wheel• Reincorporating the scattered or denied parts of our whole selves. Reintegrating mind, body, heart, spirit and earth.
“Kiva is a wise medicine woman, teacher and healer whose gentle integrity is truly an inspiration. I honor her strength, her consciousness, her wisdom…”-Ivy, on Tribe
Kiva will do the opening teaching session with the help of Loba, orienting, defining, grounding and evoking…. as well as discuss plant medicines and teachers, cofaciliate a Medicine Wheel discussion and possibly lead a plant walk if there are enough requests. Wolf will join Kiva teaching any other topics the group chooses to focus on, and will provide shamanic drumming at a special location on Saturday night.
“A surprising experience; archaic, fresh, future, wild, refined, all at once… my respects to Jesse Wolf Hardin.”-Gary Snyder, Pulitzer Prize-winning author
Together participants walk through the portal of the feeling heart, to enter into deeper connection with the daily miraculous… taking responsibility as potentially powerful, artful co-creators of our world and our reality. Those wishing, have the option of spending a night or more out on a mini-quest, or otherwise customize the weekend experience to best meet their needs.
“I find Kiva Rose to be wise, inspiring, inquisitive and kind…and surefooted, as she walks the land and learns from the green growing things.”-Kimberly Arana, Herbalist, Propriatress of The Blessed Thistle
“Jesse’s voice inspires our passion to take us further — seeing the world whole — even holy.”-Terry Tempest Williams, author of Refuge
—————-
To Participate, Click Here For Your Shaman Path Registration Form:
shamans-path-intensive-registration.doc
—————
Download this Announcement without photos, to kindly forward and post:
shaman-intensive-announcement.rtf
If you’d be willing to printout Shaman Intensive Flyers and post them in appropirate places, please dowload the file here:
Shaman Path Intensive Flyer
And click here to read Jesse’s essay: “The Shaman: Awakening the Powers Within”:
5-shaman-path-essay.doc

Logistics & Particulars will be mailed to anyone sending in a Registration Form.
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“Jesse Wolf Hardin has a true understanding of embodied spirituality – the sacred spirit in nature and in human beings… not as an abstraction but in ways sensual, practical, and transformative.” -Starhawk, author of Spiral Dance
“Wolf sings us Full Circle to the raw, sweet wildness within, and calls us forward to the future primeval.”
-Joanna Macy, author of World As Self, World As Lover
“Kiva Rose inspires me. Her passion, fascination and perpetual curiosity of plants, people, nature, and the relationship that binds them in wholeness stirs those touched by it; encourages our own listening, our own insights and musings. Kiva, in a word, rocks.”-Jim McDonald, Practicing Herbalist, Teacher & Author
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Thank you very much for forwarding this announcement, and posting it on any forums or sites you may be involved with.

Drumming and Storytelling in the Hill Country

2009-05-24T13:14:00.000-05:00

Last night just around sunset, at the point where Turtle Creek feeds the Guadalupe River, 6 women gathered with drums and stories. Goddess sang to us waterywet songs as we took our first breath together in Circle. We found a beat together, told stories together, and sang to and with eachother. It was lovely and inspiring. It was exactly what it was supposed to be and more than expected. There were fewer womyn gathered than originally planned for, but donations to the crisis council flowed like the river we sat next to. Perhaps more will join next time, and perhaps not. Either way, Courage, Inc. will sound the gathering drum again in this place very soon.

peace and courageous journeying, t

Drumming and Storytelling

2009-05-22T17:09:00.001-05:00

It's tomorrow! We've got the location, we've got some womyn who are interested. Yippee!!! Here's to the energy we will raise, the stories we will tell, and the community that we will enjoy for an evening.

Here's to the in-powering empowerment of Womyn Everywhere!

Advice for REALLY living

2009-05-20T00:04:00.000-05:00

I won't claim this as my own. I'm reposting and passing along - feel free to do the same if it moves you. We have the author's permission:

Outlaw’s Counsel:Thoughts Around Graduation Day - For Folks of All Ages!
by Jess Hardin

If there is one thing that High School and College Graduations remind me of, it’s how many harmful illusions students often carry with them as they enter the so-called adult world. I’m talking about culturally embedded lies that we hear from the time we are kids, lies such as young women and men thinking they’re “not good enough” when they have gifts and abilities that make them not only worthy but special. Or believing that their worth hinges on what will be their income level, or that money equates with happiness. It would seem that a majority of modern graduates imagine that they are personally powerless and the government all-powerful, that fitting-in is more important than distinguishing oneself, that technology can fix everything, and that love is an assuaging comfort instead of an opportunity, celebration, commitment and service. Commencement speakers all across America and the civilized world give speeches that reinforce the stock illusions as well as ever more debased values of the dominant world-order. It makes me wish I could be invited to stand before a graduating class or two myself, a token patriot outlaw from the outback advising and extolling an entirely different way of perceiving and doing. I can picture letting loose with an uncensored speech that provoked as well as affirmed, resulting in the departing students tearing off their bleak gowns and dancing like Boston Tea Party rebels atop their folding seats.
A small sampling of this sort of outlaw counsel follows, including novel (and sometimes archaic!) concepts that you might find enlightening or helpful no matter what your age or stage of life:
Every moment is a decisive moment, and your future is a blank canvas. The only things standing in your way are the fears and habits you are attached to. No one is in charge of your life but you!
You are an American citizen, not subject. Freedom isn’t something guaranteed, it’s what you personally claim and then defend.
Don’t depend on other people’s rules to determine your actions. Develop a personal code of honor, and then live up to it! Promise your allegiance to your friends, your family, your community, your cause, and the land you love. And always keep your promises.
Responsibility isn’t obligation – it’s the willingness and ability to respond.
Beware of any solutions that are sold, bottled or regulated.
Be suspicious of anything that requires fossil fuels, brags about being “disposable,” admits to having been artificially colored or flavored, or pretends to be something it’s not.
Bravely explore anything and everything that increases your degree of sensation and depth of experience, that stretches, inspires, informs or invigorates you. Taste the many diverse flavors of life, being sure to spit out the bad.
Travel and explore as much of the world as possible. This will not only make you familiar with other regions and other kinds of lifestyles, but it will also help you appreciate any place that you ever call home.
Neither our problems nor the problems of the world are caused by feeling too much. Rather, they’re caused by us feeling too little! By opening up to the pain of conscious existence, we also open ourselves up to the fullest experience of joy.
Try to remember that “making a living” isn’t the same as really living. Find work that reflects not only your skills, but also your beliefs.
Watching adventure stories on the television is a poor substitute for having adventures yourself.
There are just so many hours between birth and death… spend them carefully, on what matters most. Ideally you will discover, and then fulfill your most meaningful purpose.
The point isn’t to gather riches, but for us to have a richer life.
Having toys is not the same as having fun. Focus on sports where you actually get to play. Swim in chemical-free water, and in places where you’re “not supposed to be.” Walk barefoot through clover. Cry, laugh and sing. Hug and howl!
Never take anything for granted — not your health, your home or your family. Never answer a question by saying “whatever,” because it means that you don’t care and you know very well that you do!
It would be wise to avoid any drugs, careers, relationships or lifestyles that deaden your awareness, impair your growth or distract you from your goals or calling.
And pay attention, for goodness sake! Focus solely on your sweetheart when you’re with him or her, and on no other food than that food which you’re eating.
Remember that nothing is worth anything, unless it’s authentic!
All events, both good and bad, are valuable lessons that we can be grateful for. Avoid stubbing your toe on the same rock twice. And don’t fritter away too much precious time explaining your mistakes – just learn from them, then go on!
All the world is a great gifting cycle. Learn to give all you can. And just as importantly, learn how to graciously accept every gift that comes your way.
Take time to “be little” even if you think you’re at an age when you need to be “wise” or “cool.” Crawl around on the ground after interesting bugs, look for animal shapes in the clouds, and don’t worry if you get grass stains on your clothes!
Find divine Creation and your place in it, in every blade of grass, in every home’s backyard, but don’t forget to make pilgrimages to truly wild places.
Expose every harmful illusion or lie. And whatever is real and good, protect and nourish with all your might.
There is no one that will do the vital work for you, and thus there’s nobody else to blame! Both the responsibilities and the rewards are yours. Take credit! Then give thanks…
You have dreams, hopes, maybe even a special calling that you’ve seldom told anybody about. Now it’s time to live those dreams!
Remember that it’s hardly ever “too late” for anything, so long as you start right now.
Expect a miracle. That miracle is you.

Beginning

2009-05-13T20:59:00.001-05:00

The work.

Courage, Inc. will begin it's real-world, real-time work by hosting a drumming in the Texas Hill Country. This will be an all-women's event that will include the power of rhythm, storytelling (powerful womyn stories) and community. Donations will be sent to the Hill Country Crisi Council....

Is the destination the important thing? Or is it the Journey?

2009-05-06T13:08:00.000-05:00

I suppose it depends on who you ask. I say it's the journey. If I get oh-so-caught up in the destination, I put on blinders. What I see in front of me or around me are only those things that are directly related to the destination I have decided upon. How sad. If I put those blinders on I can become closed off from great lessons, amazing beauty, gut-wrenching tragedy, and everything else. If my vision is so honed, so focused, I miss the panoramic view that is right there in front and around me. An example: I decide to take a trip to Jackson Hole, Wyoming, which is, if you don't know, one of the most beautiful places in our United States. I decide to take a trip there to see where Han Solo lives, um, I mean Harrison Ford. That's what I'm going for. He was my hero and first crush at the age of 7, and I want to see his house. So, I get a map, I google him and his home, and I decide how long it will take me to get there from here, how long it will take me to take a photo of his house, and how long it will take me to get back again. Good planning skills, right? Sure. And a clear goal. Great. So, I set out driving as fast as the speed limit allows, stop only at major interstate towns to grab a Coke from some always-the-same chain place, pee, and get right back on the interstate going as fast as the speed limit allows. I finally arrive, get my photo of Han's house, and get back in my car to drive whatever distance home so that I can get back to work on time. Ok, so I got to my destination. Great. And I got a good picture. Fantastic. And in the process of speeding up the interstate, only stopping at plastic-coated hamburger chains, and zipping straight to Han's house, I miss the Antelope, the gigantic blue sky, the funny little back-asswards towns off the beaten track, the local flavors whatever they may be, and the panoramic view of the Grand Tetons (if I'm lucky, I do manage to see one peak in the back of Han's house).... I missed the journey. Now I have one clear moment of wonder - Han Solo's House. I could have had millions of moments of wonder, but I made a choice. And it seems to be a choice supported by our society. Get there, see it, do it, Get Back. Bummer. Am I saying there's anything wrong with goal-setting? No. Absolutely not. Goal setting, especially when spiritually influenced, can provide me with a rough direction to move in. Goal setting can help me feel a sense of achievement, better define my gifts and talents, help me to see the next step. All of that. But if my goal setting is rigid, if my goal setting is only destination focused, if my goal setting has me speeding along I25 as fast as the speed limit allows....well, I'm going to miss out. I'm going to miss the signs. Signs that I'm going in the right direction, signs that maybe I'm not, and also all the beautiful signs that point out "panoramic view" or "historical marker" or "Famous Blueberry Pie." Go ahead and set goals. But remember, if you walk along your path with you head down, eyes only focused on the road right at your feet, you might miss the patch of bright orange daisies on the side of the road. You might also miss the giant Saber Tooth Tiger drooling all over his-soon-to-be-yummy-girl- meal. And if you get narrow minded enough, you may completely miss out on your real mission. Just some thoughts.

Courageous Journeying,
t

Wake Up!

2009-05-02T20:30:00.000-05:00

Here's a link to a lovely essay on waking up by Jesse Wolf Hardin. We cannot be fully in-powered if we are not truly awake.... or at least working hard at recognizing how often we try to stay asleep.~thttp://animacenter.org/blog/?p=611

What is this Courage, Inc. Part 2

2009-05-02T18:27:00.000-05:00

Courage, Inc. is just a beginning. I think I said that before. It is the beginning of a dream, a calling, a vision, and a vow to help women. Women who may not even know they need help yet. We know that there are women out there who have had a tingle, a tickle, a jab, a dizzy-spinning-sense that something was wrong but didn't know what it was or where to find the solution. We have been those women. Women who, for whatever reason start to wake up. Start to wake up from their sleep-dream-nightmares of body hate, numbing addictions, self doubt, denial, restriction, and deep soul-silence. They start to wake up to the understanding that they are repressed and that they have, in some sense, allowed their own repression. They start to wake up and they want to say, "no more!" But they're not sure what they're saying "no more" to or what they might be saying "yes" to. We have been those women, and we long to throw ourselves into the mix as guides. We stand in the distance waving our hands over our heads screaming, "Over Here!!!! Wake up!!! Over Here!!!" We sit next to their still sleepy spirits nudging, cajoling, prodding - "wake up," we say. "Wake up and become who you were meant to be." Courage Inc. is just a beginning. The dream, vision, mission includes a full-fledged healing ministry. A not-for-profit center where women can come no matter what their financial situation. We are committed to the Sacred, and we call the Sacred, Goddess; that doesn't mean we expect you to. The Sacred, Goddess has called us to this task. This blog is where we're going to chart our course, describe it as we move along, and share our struggles and successes. It is also where we'll share, as promised, our thoughts on a number of different subjects. We heartily invite you to join us on this journey. If you're called to this kind of action, or if you're hearing the call to "wake up" talk with us, "friend" us, share our blog, link to it, talk about it. Grow with us, and let us all walk forward with Courage.

courageous journeying, t

16 Steps for Discovery and Empowerment

2009-05-02T15:30:00.000-05:00

Check these out! Talk about a spiritual revolution. Courage, Inc. would like to start some 16-step groups in real-time and host discussions over the net. You can read more about the steps in Charlotte Davis Kasl's book Many Roads, One Journey (Harper Perennial, 1992).1. We affirm we have the power to take charge of our lives and stop being dependent on substances or other people for our self-esteem and security.2. We come to believe that God/the Goddess/universe/Great Spirit/Higher Power awakens the healing wisdom within us when we open ourselves to that power.3. We make a decision to become our authentic Selves and trust in the healing power of the truth.4. We examine our beliefs, addicitons, and dependent behavior in the context of living in a hierarchal, patriarchal culture.5. We share with another person and the Universe all those things inside of us for which we feel shame and guilt.6. We affirm and enjoy our strengths, talents, and creativity, striving not to hide these qualities to protect others' egos.7. We become willing to let go of shame, guilt, and any behavior that keeps us from loving ourSelves and others.8. We make a list of people we have harmed and people who have harmed us, and take steps to clear our negative energy by making amends and sharing our grievances in a respectful way.9. We express love and gratitude to others, and increasingly appreciate the wonder of life and the blessings we do have.10. We continue to trust our reality and daily affirm that we see what we see, we know what we know, and we feel what we feel.11. We promptly acknowledge our mistakes and make amends when appropriate, but we do not say we are sorry for things we have not done and we do not cover up, analyze, or take responsibility for the shortcomings of others.12. We seek out situations, jobs, and people that affirm our intelligence, perceptions, and self-worth and avoid situations or people who are hurtful, harmful, or demeaning to us.13. We take steps to heal our physical bodies, oranize our lives, reduce stress, and have fun.14. We seek to find our inward calling, and develop the will and wisdom to follow it.15. We accept the ups and downs of life as natural events that can be used as lessons for our growth.16. We grow in awareness that we are interrelated with all living things, and we contribute to restoring peace and balance on the planet.If you're looking for a way to wake up and to heal yourSelf and the world, here are some steps you can take!

Here's to a courageous journey!
t

Fear and the Swine Flu

2009-04-30T15:18:00.000-05:00

Hi all....So the media's telling us to be scared of this swine flu. You know what? There was a time in this courage-walker's life when she might have allowed such medial hysteria to paralyze her. Not anymore. And I am a true believer in taking responsibility for everything that we can, and that includes our health. So here's a link to my favorite Medicine Woman's advice about the flu. Take action. Don't let fear hold you back. I've found that whenever I DO take action, I feel like a Warrior.So here's the link: http://bearmedicineherbals.com/?p=633
Courageous Journeying!t

What is this Courage, Inc? Part I

2009-04-28T15:20:00.000-05:00

Courage, Inc. is the first little glimmer of a vision and a mission that has been bubbling for the past year or so. My own work on growing courage, living an authentic life, and moving toward dreams rather than what I thought others thought I should do, led to lots of conversations with the Sacred, Goddess to me. Almost a year ago, I was lost in New Mexico having just realized that I left both a hotel key and my credit card somewhere in Taos. Dreams of a healing center were still rolling in my head, and as I drove around in the cold, I vowed to make that healing center come true. I had known it was a vision and a mission, but I hadn't yet made the vow..... And after the vow, and a lot of talking, the vision and the mission sat bubbling around in my head for a while longer. I kept wondering how to make it happen, and I learned that until I stepped into the vision, rather than just looking at it and talking about it, I would never know the next step. And that is what Courage, Inc. represents. The first step. Courageous Journeys, t

A new day

2009-04-27T14:20:00.001-05:00

Courage, Inc. is a new beginning on a new Day. This dream of working for and with women is going to come true because it is true in this moment. I am thrilled about the possibilities and look forward to sharing thoughts and experiences here. The mission - to work toward the empowerment (in-powerment) of women, to journey through fear with courage, and to embrace authentic life free from the bonds of the thin-ideal, self-objectification, addiction, cultural expectations, and all the little and big fears that keep us stuck in these bonds. Hooray for a New Day. Hooray for Courage. May we all be warriors and serve our own Wild Souls and our Wild Wild Earth. Peace, t